#36: Those Fucking CSI Dectective Shows

I really don't get it. Can someone tell me what is so great about these shows? Pretty much everyone I know watches them. I tried to get into them, I really did. I wanted to care about David Caruso's one-liners...I wanted to care about that emo bitch on NCIS...I even watched 'The Closer' with Kyra Sedgwick one time (big fucking mistake). Besides having a face that looks like something my 7 year old cousin would make on a griddle out of pancake batter, she talks in a god-awful southern accent that sounds like Forrest Gump's sister. I could understand if there was one of these shows that was popular, maybe even two, but it seems like there are more of these fucking "crime dramas" than there are Gosselin children. They're all the fucking same! Somebody either commits a murder, or rapes a bitch, or steals a huge amount of money. Oh and there is always some stupid fucking connection between the culprit and one of the characters on the show. Like maybe the boss knew the killer when they were 5 and they played in the same sandbox together which makes it REALLY HARD FOR THE BOSS TO GIVE HIM THE DEATH PENALTY BOO FUCKING HOO. The person that pisses me off the most though, is that girl on NCIS, the one who wears bondage shit to work? Like anyone would let that slide in real life. That chick would walk into work with a spike necklace and fishnets and everyone would laugh at her as she got fired. They'd probably see her at some dirty strip club downtown a couple weeks later, because she's obviously got more daddy issues than Michael Jackson's kids. None of the officers ever shoot anyone either. Maybe its because of the censors or something but its just retarded how the villian guy can go around and rape 20 people and blow up a school bus, but when they get him in a standoff everyone's all DON'T SHOOT HIM HE'LL GET WHAT HE DESERVES IN JAIL. Fuck that, if some asshole like that was pointing a gun at me he'd have a led skull faster than you can say Joran van der Sloot.