Romance is dead. Chivalry is dead. Or at least 95% gone. You know it, I know it, but apparently there is a coalition of sluts out there convinced that Gerard Butler or some other fuck head is going to come sweep them off their feet and get married and be in love forever OMG OMG Robert Pattinson is hot but I’m TEAM JACOB!!!!!!!!!!! Nope. Here’s how it happens in movies: there is a dude, (always some combination of ripped/smart/rich, or even all three) who meets a girl in some interesting or "cute" way. Then after a few comedic hijinks, they end up getting married and living happily ever after. I can think of maybe 2 or 3 movies out of the countless romantic comedies I’ve been dragged to by some bitch that didn’t end with the guy getting the girl and everything being perfect at the end. Sure, that’s a great formula for sucking cash out of retarded starry eyed teenage sluts but it also creates certain expectations that are hilarious (to me) to watch. I cannot count the amount of times I’ve seen girls begin a relationship with someone and after like a week start complaining about how he doesn’t take them out, or how he always wants sex, or some other whore logic that makes no sense to me. News Flash: any normal dude, from the ages of 14-45 is going to want to fuck his girlfriend/wife. Why is that such a fucking problem? Oh no, my boyfriend finds me physically attractive. There must be something wrong with him (whore logic). Don't believe me? Think of everyone you know. How many people do you know that have been in relationships longer than a year? No way in hell is it more than 5 or 6. So thanks Hollywood, for cock blocking me numerous times and fucking up the brains of 99% of women everywhere
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