#69: Your Face

Fuck your face. Its so stupid! If your face was a person it would be Gilbert Gottfried. And Jafar would fucking beat the shit out of it all the time. Who does your face think he/she is? Seriously. I would rather watch a sex tape of Star Jones and Larry the Cable Guy in slow motion than see your face for one more second. I heard from this guy that your face has AIDS and is fucking stupid. I trust that guy too, he knows his shit. If my face and your face got in a fight, my face would be like an atom bomb and your face would be like Hiroshima. As in your face would get destroyed and after it was dead it wouldn't even be able to sustain life for like 30-40 years because of all the radiation. People call your face a retarded asshole because stupid shit comes out of your mouth all day (get it, retarded asshole/stupid shit). If your face was a color, it would be chartreuse. AKA the gayest of all colors. Once upon a time, your face was a princess trapped in a castle guarded by a dragon. The only way you could leave is if someone came and slayed the dragon and married you. Your face never left because everyone saw how fucking stupid your face was and said fuck that shit with a big dick. Which reminds me, your face also gets face fucked on the daily. Yep, your face is a pro at taking dick. If there was a league for sucking dick, the NDSA (National Dick Sucking Association), then your face would be a perennial favorite to win their MVP award. And more than likely your throat would get 6th man of the year. If I had you, Brendan Fraser, and That Shithead Spider Who Lives Outside My House tied up in a room together, and I had a gun with 17 bullets (not practical I realize), I would empty the clip into your stupid fucking mongoloid face. It looks like your teeth are fighting a civil war, North vs. South, and your gums are losing. Your lip to gum ratio is worse than the rate of literacy in Africa. I could set up a modern art gallery with your face as the main exhibit and all the pretentious Portland art fucks would love it. But that's not a good thing.